The Vibe And Shine

The year 2015 was the hardest year of my life. I'm telling you this deeply painful story so you can understand, when life squeezes you really tight: You're manifesting the version of the lesson you need in the exact way that is going to be most effective in getting you to learn the fucking lesson.   How tightly life squeezes you is showing you how much resistance you've been having to letting go of self-limiting behaviour and patterns so you can get to the next fruitful phase of your life. Life squeezing you that hard is giving you an opportunity to turn your pain into your own empowerment. If you have pain, there is a way you can empower yourself. IT will all be worth it once its done. The Story Begins: Circa 2014. At this portion of my life story, I had just moved to Cape Town, my own business had failed due to not yet knowing or understanding this city's rhythms, I could not find work, and as a result could not afford to pay for my car or rent. This wen...

Someone I met and briefly engaged with a handful of times in the conscious community here in Cape Town took her own life a few days ago. While I didn't know her well, news of her opting out of life has brought up several things for my consideration. This woman was 32, just a few years younger than me. She climbed the mountain and lept from a cliff to her death. A helicopter was sent to retrieve her body from the slopes of the mountain. My observations of what it has brought up in me are thus: Leaping off of a cliff at a height great enough to kill you takes and enormous amount of braveness. That she would rather summon that amount of courage and do something as scary as jump off of a cliff instead of continue on with life is huge internal process to move through. The darkness must have been strong for her to opt out at all, let alone in such a spectacularly courageous way. I understand and have great compassion for where she must have been with her relati...

There's this thing that happens with me, and I thought to share it with you in case it's happening with you too. It comes when the summer months begin to cool, and then in reverse when the spring comes and everything starts moving outwards again. You may have experienced it as Seasonal Affective Disorder, winter blues, or any other label that sums up what it looks like moving into your feminine energies of emotion, purging, creativity, and flow . From the expansive warmth of the outward summer experience, the contractive inner abyss of winter's introspective season begins. And it can feel extremely uncomfortable. This process can unfold at anytime throughout your year and is not strictly a winter activity. It comes when you most need it, and can be seasonal, depending on the pace of your life. Deep Spaces My process seems to get louder and more stubborn as I move through life with each cycle. This past outer experience in my masculine energy was as ...

Wow! What a ride the past six months have been. It's time for one cycle to close, and a new one to begin. With summer here in the southern hemisphere coming to an end, so too does the wild, chaotic, outward exploration of experience this season has been. I knew it was going to be tough, but here I am... six months of non-stop action with one week to go before I head off on vacation to begin my 40th year of life on this crazy blue and green marble in space. This week feels as though it's the grand finale after extreme amounts of energetic pushing, yet flowing at the same time. Does that even make sense? Somehow it does, and in a way I sense balance. I am filled with a multiverse of emotion right now, and not wanting to get sucked into a victim mentality, but rather take a position of an objective witness, I begin to notice the culmination and effect of all that energy spent so relentlessly as I challenged myself to do my best. I have also been keeping tabs open on how...

There seems to be a bit of a misunderstanding about what kind of person you need to be when you're on a path of exploration with life and yourself. I've heard this common misconception projected toward me from a number of people when they say things like; "You don't look spiritual ", or "You're not like the others", or "You don't dress like a spiritual person". What does 's piritual ' look like? First of all, I am not 's piritual '. Rather: I am a spirit. And so are you, and every other being on this planet. We occupy a body for the duration of this lifetime. We are here to have a human experience, equipped with all the emotions and hormonal responses that having a human body brings with it. Still, I am not spiritual . I am merely tuned in to the spark of life that is the energetic force for this fleshy vessel I journey this realm in. Some would call it the soul. I am consciousness, and have awareness of wh...

I would like to speak about vulnerability in an upcoming post, but I felt it necessary to first be vulnerable with you and let you know you're not alone in your journey through your shadow, and that creating a better life for yourself requires tough emotional work that all 'wayshowers' also face. It's because we've chosen to face the darkness inside ourselves and move through our shadows that we can show you the way. It's not because we were brought to this earth without darkness and only know how to navigate the light. We know our way through the dark and show you how to find your way through yours. Just because I've decided to pay the knowledge I've acquired forward to help others does not make me immune to pain from now on. I'm a human, just like everyone else, and while I have worked damn hard to rise above much of my earlier suffering and bust through many barriers of my mind that kept me trapped, I do still get tripped up in life on ...